Under Construction

For those of us with siblings, think back to the last time you had a quarrel with them. This moment may have been a fair few years back, or it may have been only a few minutes ago. Usually, these futile arguments do not cease until the referee (in the form of a mother, father, caretaker or guardian) dare to step into the picture. They have the authority to demand silence, resolve the dispute and the power to force opposing sides to say sorry.

My younger brother and I are three years apart. So I guess you could say there wasn't all that much between us. We grew up together, caused trouble together, and by the time I got my first boyfriend, it wasn't long until he witnessed his first glimpse of puppy love. As much as we hate to admit, I'd say we have a good brother-sister relationship. We get along abnormally well.

Reminising, back in the days, we had the absolute DUMBEST fights. We used to fight over those crappy TAZO's you get free with every purchase of chips. Back then, they were the shi*t. We fought over who should switch off the television. On one occassion, our argument was so heated it caused him to throw one of them cheap plastic toys you get free with the oldskool McDonald Happy Meals. What's with fighting over free stuff in my family? Anyway, our grudges were usually forgotten at the words 'hey kids, food's ready!' ;and set aside until the next time we needed something to use against each other.

My mother always said that we never learnt our lesson. That no matter how many fights we had in one day, there was always room for more. We didn't stop until someone got hurt.

I could say the same about relationships. Few, if not any of us have reached our peak of wisdom or have completely matured; no matter how adult we think we are. At the moment we are 'under construction', physically, mentally and emotionally. When you think of typical construction sites, you think of the dangers in them. Dangers that cause harm, dangers that have the potential of scarring you for life.

Then why are we so willing to commit ourselves to these people, these construction sites. They still have a long way to go in the development stage. Alterations are yet to be added in the Brains Department. We go from one construction site to another, getting hurt every single time. We don't stop until someone gets hurt. Even then, it is only a matter of time until we move on to another danger zone.

But then again, it's through these risks that we grow and develop. Sometimes we choose to take these lessons on board and sometimes we choose to totally ignore them. It's a process of trial and error, or simply putting up with the people that hurt us - unconditional love.

Maths 4 Life

Introducing.. THE NEW BRANCH OF ADVANCED MATHS.

Mathematics. So beautiful. Feel the sex appeal of the term just roll of your tongue. Let it take hold of you. Let the numbers guide you.

Sarrah Mae, my research partner in 'Sexuality behind Mathematics' are proud to announce the results from our extensive research project. Today, Friday 24 June 2005, has marked a significant milestone in this unusual YET sensual branch of mathematics. It is an art form.

I'd like to extend my gratitude to fellow work collegues; Frances in particular for her ongoing support throughout the day. Hazel-Ann for her attempts for further studies in the field of triangles. Last but not least, John-Louis for delving to link mathematics with that of scientifically proven theories. Pure genius.

Results:

* In the process of factorisation: You be the denominator, I be the numerator. Together we shall multiply.multiply.multiply.multiply.multiply.multiply.
* My love for you is like a reoccuring decimal. It never ends.
* In the process of 'completing the square': You complete my life.
* You and I are like an improper fraction. We never work out.
* I think it's best we break up and go our parallel ways. Never to meet.
* In such situations when the quadratic equation has two possible solutions: Which solution will you choose? Talk about love triangle.
* I love you like a smart kid loves mathematics.
* Your ass is like a symetrical perfect quartic, with two point of inflexion with two minima.
* Spread of scores: Spread the love like the standard deviation of 6862.. at least!
* Why can't we be like a cooper pair of electrons, always supporting each other?

Every night I prayed for someone like you. God looked down at me from the angle of depression. It depresses me to know you can never be mine.

Bess Frennss !!

To all my friends, thankyou.. for everything! You all know who you are. Each child is like a piece of paper, whereby each person that comes into their life leaves a mark. Well, you guys have 'scribbled me happy'.

The antidote for 50 enemies is 1 friend.
- Aristotle

Bling Bling

A lot of guys out there are like fake imitation jewellery. CHEAP THRILLS. Their attractive features lure you. You're sucked into buying them. But sooner or later, after you've scratched the surface, you see them for the useless, good for nothing, piece of sh*t they are. You no longer appreciate them as much as you did in the beginning. If only they came with expiary dates we'd know how much of ourselves, and our time, to give.

Isn't it peculiar how guys are most attractive the less you know about them? We'll drool over them from a distance, but up close they're almost unbearable. We regret having asked those questions about being scared of the dark, the real reason as to why they last cried and confessing to what bad habits they have. Some things are better left unsaid; or perhaps just talking should be congested altogether.

More partners. More cheating. More casual sex. More one night stands. It's not right, but its okay. Welcome to the future. We hope you enjoy your stay. The emotional element in relationships rarely play a significant role anymore. Gradually, its been somewhat 'bred out of civilisation'. We're becoming a society where all you need to make achieve in life is good looks. You've won the draw. First prize - a one way ticket to suceess and a lifetime supply of men/women at your feet; they're intentions are'nt genuine but like that matters anyway, right? The smart and potentially successful people are discouraged and bullied.

Shallow, yes; but its the truth. This is how our society functions these days. Lower marriage figures accompanied by an increase in divorce rates. In relationships, our attention span has definitely more than halved. We fail to appreciate the imperfections that, ultimately, make someone truly beautiful.

Our problem is
that we make the mistake
of comparing ourselves
with other people.
You are not inferior or superior
to any human being...
You do not determine your success
by comparing yourself to others,
rather you determine your success
by comparing your
accomplishments to your capabilities.
You are 'number one'
when you do the best you can
with what you have,
everyday.
- Z. Siglar

I admire people who strive in fields where they are unaccustomed. A business person who participates in a charity marathon. An average grade student who tries their best, rather than a top student who naturally aces tests. A shy, private, soft-spoken person who introduces themselves to a stranger.

We all want to find someone different. Someone who isn't afraid to be themselves. Someone down to earth. Someone who goes about life unaffected by what others think. In my opinion, I believe this attribute is present within everyone, but is masked by an act. We think no one in the world understands us. When as a matter of fact, a lot of us probably feel the same; but just don't know it. Why? Because we're all so damn plastic.

Be yourself; nobody is better qualified.

Killing Me Softly

I believe that everything in life happens for a reason. There is no right, and there is no wrong. Just a whole bunch of situations that lead to either good things or bad things. I think God put me into this family because I wouldn't have learnt particular lessons in life any other way. The divorce of my parents has taught me more than what a million boyfriends ever could.

When I was little, I thought things would ALWAYS be the same. Dad will ALWAYS come home from work every night. Every weekend will ALWAYS be spent paying the bills at the local shopping centre, followed by the purchase of any product from the Barbie Doll range. My family will ALWAYS love each other. My father would ALWAYS keep his promises. But as I have discovered, things don't always go to plan. I have witnessed that sometimes these plans take on a life of their own.

If I had to do it all again
I wouldn't take away the rain
Coz I know it made me who I am
If I had to do it all again
I've learnt so much from my mistakes...
- Faith Evans, Again

As a little girl, I used to pray to god. Thanking him for everything from the birds to the bee's.. the trees to the air we breathe, from the cars on the road to the toys I owned. I also prayed for God to make me a better person. I guess being at such a young age I didn't understand the possibilities that could arise from such a prayer. Maybe I was under the impression that one day I'd just wake up being ten times wiser; with no such experiences to draw such wisdom from. Instead, God gave me years of hell, years of obstacles and it was up to me to overcome them. It took a considerable amount of time to accept that dwelling in my misery was getting me nowhere. God gave me problems to conquer in order to become 'the better person' I had prayed so long ago to become. Now, at 15 years and 9 months of age, I believe that prayer has been granted.

This world, this world is cold
But you don't, you don't have to go
You're feeling sad you're feeling lonely
And no one seems to care
You're mother's gone and your father hits you
This pain you cannot bare...

Hold on...if you feel like letting go
Hold on...it gets better than you know

-Good Charlotte, Hold On

The 'Great' Depression

You know what pisses me off? People who claim to be 'depressed'. If you're upset then fine, my heart goes out to you, but don't go telling everyone you're 'depressed' like it's something to be be proud of. People who are depressed don't go announcing it out to the world wanting to be noticed then reject the people offering to help. Then later that night they're fine again. You don't have a depression problem, you have an attention problem. Depression, its not a fashion statement.

The all time cliche would, in my opinion be 'I love you' ; with 'I'm depressed' being the runner up. Give it time and at the rate we're going, eventually the entire world population will be depressed.