Self validation

SINCE WHEN did it become acceptable for bright, young girls to portray themselves so proudly in a negative light?

Let's get one embarrassing fact out of the way. We're all suckers for Myspace. Even the people who don't have an account, either…

* had one and deleted it

* use a friend's password to get in

* restrict themselves to browsing public profiles

Is it just me, or is there a growing trend of girls degrading themselves conceitedly on Myspace profiles? Things such as…

"I'm a quarter Filo, half Spanish, an eighth German, two thirds of one sixteenth Chinese…half a fifth Peurto Rican"

(If only you spent half as much energy doing your maths homework, as you do concocting a very creative family history. You've just redefined the term lowest common denominator in my books!)

"I enjoy the simple things in life; by the way here's my wish list…

$43789658643 Tsubi frying pan… $4534576 Gucci toothpaste…"

(I think the word you were looking for is materialistic!)

"I love God… so who's ready to get Smashed at Joe's 21st on Saturday night, anyone know where I can get fake ID's?"

(Which God? I'm sure the other lowest common denominators are just dying to know!)

"Ewww I'm so ugly!"

(Yep, that explains why you've posted forty photographs of yourself, thirty nine with cleavage. Nice job!)

It seems as though self respect was lost somewhere between logging in and personalising one's profile for the first time. Who are they trying to please? Claiming to be the 'life of the party' and 'queen of the dance floor' doesn't stand too firmly when there's another million girls declaring the same title. And if so, my dream scenario would be hosting 'The Annual Life of the Party and Queen of the Dance Floor Party' – and watch all these female ego maniacs fight for attention with one another.

And then there are the people who literally name their friends like a shopping list, with a little dedication to add some sense of credibility. There's a girl I know. Let's name her Tammie*. She was a few grades above me. She was polite and shy – to the extent that I had never seen her face produce more than three facial expressions. That was then. Now she hangs around party goers, clubbers, luvos, drinkers, smokers, druggers. Which makes me wonder, was she always like that, and just dominated by other girls in her group? Or has Tammie transformed herself, and befriended herself with people who don't know the girl she was, or secretly is? What does it say about someone's loyalty to their new best friend of two weeks, having recently forsaken their high school bestie of six years?

After our clubbing years are over; and by the time our grandkids have managed to produce a style of unheard of music; by the time wrinkles have gotten the best of us; after realising that Insight doesn't stock sleeping gowns for the elderly…

While the nerds have billion dollar companies, investment homes, and a good credit history - let me ask you this: where will you be?

Still chasing for the latest runway trends? Still partying? I wonder if the young ones would approve of Piss-Ups-For-Pensions.

I believe that for every criticism, the individual is compensating for at least two insecurities of their own. I am not criticising – but merely sharing observations. I'm not the dance floor diva, and I'm not the self confessed bitch… so someone's got to be the observant wallflower, right? And in this instance, that person is me.

For all you know, panning people on Myspace is the only thing that gets me through my struggle for identity – wanting to go to the very parties that the lowest common denominators go to, and angry at myself for lacking the willpower to stop reading eight hundred page novels.