A friend and I were catching up, and she started telling me about the guys she’s kissed. Some were good, and some were bad… really bad. All her reasons were attributable to him. What he did, and what he didn’t do.
And then we thought, to what extent are we responsible for such bad kisses? Do they kiss badly because of something we’re doing wrong?
So I started asking around.
A friend of mine has a theory that kissing is much like dancing. Guy leads, girl follows. Using this logic, girls have a style that they like, as opposed to a style that they impose.
However, another friend confessed the opposite. "The first time I kissed my current boyfriend, I was so used to how I had kissed my previous one that I went in tongue-first without thinking. He just kept kissing me back sans tongue and very gently - I'm a better kisser now because of learning from him!”
This confirmed another response I received, in which “the first time two people kiss they use what they like, and then its whoever’s style they like the most that will take over. Maybe the other person had never been exposed to the other way of kissing and will change.”
Then again, maybe what makes a kiss good or bad isn’t so much in the technique as it is in the attraction you have for the other person.
“I think everybody just has their own style, what’s bad to me may be great for someone else. And its one of the main ways you know if you're going to be compatible with that person, not necessarily just sexually, but kisses are so important in day to day existence, everything from hello to goodbye to I’m sorry requires a different type of kiss. And they have to be pleasant and reassuring. So if you're kissing someone and its bad to you (if it's not clicking they're probably thinking the same thing) then you should get out of there quick!”
“I honestly think it’s about the chemistry, you may be an amazing kisser to one person but not to another, reason being that you’re not emotionally/sexually stimulated towards that person as they may be to you.”
So there you have it. Everyone has his or her own style. Kissing styles can be received, delivered and changed. Maybe bad kisses happen when two people both want to impose their own styles, with neither person wanting to change, and/or when there's no emotional or sexual attraction for the other person.
Love, Noeline
xox
love this noel!!
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