Going up?

A couple of weeks ago, my boyfriend and I got into a heated argument about whether the toilet seat should be left up or down. And as you could have guessed, I vied for it to be down, whereas he insisted it should be left up.

I SAY...
- Unless we're using a public toilet at seven eleven, girls don't make a mental note to make sure that the toilet seat is down - we just expect it to be.

- Think it sounds stupid? How many female readers have fallen victim to being greeted by a cold slab of cement where the sun don't shine? Or worse, the combo of realising that you're also sitting on left overs that didn't quite make the bowl? Or even more worse, falling right in?

- Boys are the only ones who use it up anyway, so they should put it back down while they're there.

- We've been brought up to think that leaving the toilet seat up is rude to do to others, and rude to have done to you. Just wait till we tell your mum.

- It looks nicer. As Paul Aitken points out, "No bathroom featured in a home magazine is ever shown with the lid [let alone seat] up."

Reasons such as mine have led one man to start a forum - concluding that women should put up with the habits of men and "hover" from now on. Writing under the name the name moJoe, he deduces that...

1. Women enter the bathroom with their eyes closed or while staring at the ceiling.
2. Women open the bathroom door and then proceed to back into the bathroom using their rear-end to locate the toilet.
3. Women only do bathroom business after daylight hours and are incapable of and/or unwilling to operate a light switch.
4. All women are very cleverly hiding the fact that they are born blind.
5. Toilets/toilet seats are diabolically engineered to be completely invisible to women.

Coming from a woman, we are not blind, nor are toilets invisible. Growing up, it was an ultimate truth that the toilet seat stays down. (Save for those few traumatic experiences that only reinforced the male members of our family to put it back down). So we never developed any habitual tendencies that would cause us to look down every single bloody time we went to do our business.

HE SAYS...
- For starters, as if you'd fall in. That's one of the most stupid things I've ever heard.

- It's sexist and discriminatory labour that men should be the one to put the toilet seat back down after we've used it.

- Women are lazy for not checking whether or not it's up.

- Women are just too lazy to put it back down.

Take a lesson from your comrade who states that

"Foreplay begins with putting the toilet seat down without being asked!" - Larry James

So if you're male, and plan to pee all over the toilet seat to reap revenge on your significant other (like some men in this forum have), just don't expect to get any.

Love, Noeline
xox