Soulmates: Fact or Fiction?

Up until the age of seven, if I wasn't eating, crying or sleeping - I was watching Disney videos of The Swan Princess, Snow White, Cinderella, Aladdin, Robin Hood, Beauty & the Beast, etc. Which believe me, is more than enough time for a girl to convince herself that soulmates were the person you married. That was until I grew up. Come the 21st century with divorce rates and promiscuity on the rise; combined with the growing acceptance of both - I couldn't help but think otherwise.

So when you do the maths and 1+1 still equals 1 (one man + one woman = one soul), the prospect of landing on a single definition of 'soulmate' doesn't look too promising.

Under the concept of Greek mythology, humans had four arms, four legs, and one head with two faces. Zeus (God of sky and thunder) divided each creature in two, condemning humanity as we know it, to a life long search for their other half. It was the act of intercourse that made them 'complete'. Taking this from a religious angle, Lana said that 'when God made us he made someone to match, sort of like Adam and Eve'.

For argument's sake, let's say that we're all destined for one person out there. Based on the chances of probability, a few good million are bound to die due to car accidents, disease, murder etc. What if your soulmate is one of them? What then, is the point of living if the person meant to 'complete' you is no longer alive?

I on the other hand, used to take offence to such a belief, which placed romance as the border between a meaningful and meaningless life. I thought it substantiated single people to feel worthless and committed people to act clingy.

But now I realise that like alcohol, this notion has the potential to be destructive. For example, I'd never date Mr. Suicidal, or encourage girls in abusive relationships to stay with her boyfriend in the name of 'love'. Hence why I believe that there is nothing more admirable than a person who, regardless of how much they love their partner, love themselves enough to leave a bad relationship.

Have you ever locked eyes with a stranger but felt like you've known them your whole life? Why of course not! That crapola only happens in the movies right? Well hear this… In accordance to the Hindu notion of karma - couples are reincarnated in order to resolve problems carried over from their previous life. So if you and your partner still have issues outstanding from your past life, destiny will unite you together again in the hope of reaching a resolution or learning a lesson. So maybe the reason why you're so in love during this lifetime is because you didn't love each other enough before. But being the 2 minute noodle generation that we are - expect everything to be as instant as powdered mash potato. So if you're in one of those on-again-off-again relationships, who's to say your love life won't flourish in the next?

I was rather awakened to my senses when Danny said "If you had a soulmate why would you fall in love with other people? Wouldn't you just fall for the person who's your soulmate?". In a society where you can fall in love with more than one person, how do you differentiate between a multitude of lovers and your ultimate soulmate? Perhaps we've got it all wrong. Maybe this whole soulmate thing is a 'state of mind'. Aileen says "you can have that soulmate connection with a couple of people during your life".

Why is that with bumping into old friends 'it's a small world'? But when it comes to finding your soulmate the world is suddenly big again. Amanda said that finding "one person out of a population of 6billion is farfetched". In agreement, John believed in soulmates but perhaps "they're on the other side of the world, you have to travel the world to find them". So what hope does that hold for us who can't afford to fund such a search? (Applying for next season's The Amazing Race is sounding like a good idea!).

In the brutally honest words of Joseph and Jasmin: "when you're single or in a bad relationship you tend not to believe in soulmates… but when you're in a good relationship you're more likely to believe in them again".

And me? Well, I believe in the ability to love more than one person in your life, even a few at the same time. Because people change. And sometimes you find yourself forever in love with someone's old self. I'd say that my friends are the closest things I have to a soulmate, and even then - it's still not forever. I believe soulmates are merely an extreme form of monogamy. I believe that I am complete in all my wholeness, and lovers are there to accompany you on this wonderful thing called life!

I like the word soul. I like the word mates. Other than that, you got me! - Mr. Big in Sex & the City